Chris and Kristin Pagano

Last Post

2009-06-06T14:07:00.000-07:00

This is the last post; this blog is done.

We hit the peak a long time ago, and it's been a steady decline ever since. As of now, I have no desire to keep writing and very few ideas.

So I just thought I'd officially close it down, as there's no reason for you to keep checking back if I'm not going to keep writing.

Thanks for reading.

Memorial Day Weekend - Eating

2009-05-27T19:23:00.000-07:00

I went to visit my friend Tim in South Carolina over the long weekend. This was my sixth time to visit him: three times while he lived near Indianapolis and now three times in South Carolina. Of those trips, I've seen two Indy 500's, one Brickyard 400, and this would be my third Coca-Cola 600.

Well, it rained all weekend, and that ruined the racing. So there's no real need to discuss the particulars of the NASCAR drivers' inability to drive around in circles in the rain. I might as well discuss some of the fine foods I had over the weekend. Please keep in mind, this is not a comprehensive list, just the highlights:

Friday (DFW Airport)

KFC chicken tenders - pretty good, but as soon as I sat down, I noticed the Auntie Anne's pretzel dog, and I seriously considered getting one of those as well.

Saturday (downtown Charlotte):

1 polish sausage sandwich - excellent
1 deep-fried twinkie - I've always wanted to have one. But it was quite disappointing. I just don't see the point of having fried dough surround something that is already so obviously perfect. And what made this even more disappointing is that right after I finished this and couldn't possibly eat anymore, we saw a couple of guys walk by eating chocolate-covered frozen cheesecake on a stick. That looked like one of the best desserts ever, and I didn't get any.

Sunday (Lowe's Motor Speedway):

1 giant turkey leg - pretty good. I've always wanted one of these as well. It wasn't anything special, but I'm glad I had it.
1 Dove bar - I really needed some ice cream

Monday (Lowe's Motor Speedway)

2 slices of Domino's pizza - you just can't go wrong with this choice

That's really about it. I suppose it could have been worse. However, on my flight home, I started feeling sick, and now I have a sore throat and a cold. So what's that old saying: "Feed a fever, starve a cold." Or is it: "Feed a cold, starve a fever." Or maybe it's "Feed a cold, feed a fever." Either way, I was supposed to be on a diet and exercising once I got home. But now that I'm oh so slightly under the weather, I feel I should continue eating so as to improve both my physical and mental health.

Laundry Mishaps

2009-05-27T19:07:00.000-07:00

We usually do laundry on the weekend, every two weeks. However, because I was going to be gone over the Memorial Day weekend, and because Kristin would have people over, I told her that I'd do half of it (the first two loads) on Wednesday (a week ago today), and the other two loads on Thursday. Well, things did not go exactly according to plan.

On my first night of solo laundry, I washed and then dried a sweater of Kristin's that she did not want dried. I shrunk it. She had worn it only once, and it was ruined by my poor laundering skills.

On the second night of laundry, I had to wash the sheets. Well, all the sheets wouldn't fit into one machine, so I divvied them up. That meant I had to get some other stuff into each of the two machines. And since most of what I had left were Kristin's jeans , I threw a few pairs of jeans into each machine. Well, one of the jeans was brand new, and it made our bed sheets a very light blue.

So, two nights of laundry, two large mistakes. I think the lesson here is that I'm an idiot and that I cannot be trusted with simple household chores.

Also, there are two final points to make:

The blue-ness of the sheets isn't really a big deal, because a) no one ever sees them, and b) even when you do see them, the blue-ness is only really visible in the right light and in comparison to the pillow cases, which luckily made their way into the other washing machine.
The offending pair of jeans which caused this blue-ness was Kristin's brand new pair from the Blue Jeans Bar, which she got because she got a gift certificate after winning her NCAA tournament pool. So this is another example of financial karma, which I talked about many many posts ago.

Kristin's Reign of Terror

2009-05-17T09:28:00.000-07:00

Last night, we went out to the local bar to celebrate the birthday of one of Kristin's co-workers. We went to Ma'Kai, in Santa Monica, right next to the pier. It's a cool place. We had a few drinks. However, the plan was that a bunch of people would be heading three doors down near the end of the night to Joe's Pizza, which is a Santa Monica institution. Kristin has never let me have Joe's.

Anyway, last night, it was needed, desperately. It was late; I had had a couple drinks; and I was starving. The thought of a greasy, pepperoni-laden slice (or two) of pizza was something I could not get out of mind. Unfortunately, as we left, Kristin made me walk right past it, in agony.

I would have disobeyed her orders to forego the pizza, but I would have gotten the stare of death as well as some comment, like "Really?" or "You do what you have to do" in some completely disappointed and nasty tone.

I guess I need to send Kristin out of town before I can finally go to Joe's Pizza. If any of Kristin's friends want to invite her to go visit them sometime soon, please go ahead.

Banana Republic Strikes Back

2009-05-17T09:16:00.000-07:00

A couple months ago, I wrote about Kristin's gambling habit. I made some defamatory remarks about Banana Republic, basically being no better than a casino feeding an addiction. Well, Banana Republic has bested me yet again. They invited Kristin to an "exclusive" party for being a deluxe card member. Basically, because she spends too much money there, they tricked her into believing that she was invited to some exclusive party, where she could spend even more money. So on Thursday, she attended this party, where they had a DJ, free wine and appetizers, and everything was 40% off. She came home with a bunch of stuff.

I told her that she wasted a lot of money; she claimed that she had gotten so many good deals.

Softball Season Ends

2009-05-06T20:38:00.000-07:00

Kristin is tired of the softball stories. So in its place is a vast amount of nothingness.

Condo Negotiations Revisited

2009-05-03T12:07:00.001-07:00

We did not win our auction to buy the condo on 6th street in Santa Monica. We found this out on Friday. So with our down-payment just burning a hole in our pocket, we went out for a nice dinner. It was good.

Negotiating Tactics

2009-04-30T08:11:00.000-07:00

Kristin and I have been considering buying a home in Santa Monica. We've been looking at condos for the last few months and have recently gotten serious. So we made an offer on one condo. It's a short sale, and that always take a lot of time to get a response. Well, last night, we finally heard back, and the banks decided to counter.

Their counter was to ask us to submit our best and final offer. I guess the issue is that there are four other bidders. So even though we offered the full asking price, we're now involved in an auction. Unfortunately, I know only one negotiating tactic, and it doesn't work well in an auction environment. That tactic is "the walk away": you get the other side emotionally involved, but you remain unmotivated. Then, when everyone seems close to a deal, you threaten to "just walk away," just as Kelly Clarkson mentioned in her song. Unfortunately, we're competing against four other bidders, so that's not likely to work here. It looks like we'll raise our offer price by $6k, and that's it. Either we win, or we lose.

Negotiating is not fun when you're flying blind as we are, but that's all we can do right now.

Stuff That's Going On

2009-04-29T08:13:00.000-07:00

As you can tell, blogging has been slow as of late. I've run out of ideas and motivation. I still have plenty of time to be blogging, I've just had nothing to say. This weekend, someone mentioned to me that I've probably come to realize that my life is just as boring as everyone else's. No, that's exactly the wrong conclusion, since I've always known that my life is boring. It's just that I managed to spruce things up in the blog through various rants that have no real meaning or importance. Anyway, I'd had thoughts about letting the blog die out, but I thought I'd give it another go and try to keep this thing alive for a while longer, and then reassess at some point in the future.

So let's discuss some issues in the Pagano household:

Softball: Since I haven't written lately, I will update you and let you know that last week, we lost another 1-run game, to fall to 3-5 on the season. Last night, therefore, was our ninth game, and it was our finest performance. We won 20-5, invoking the "slaughter" rule. I myself played well (and it's so amazing how you can actually hit the ball when you keep your eyes on it), although all that matters is that the team got a "W." We're now 4-5 with an outside shot at the playoffs. And if we make it in, we're a force to be reckoned with! Whether we make the playoffs or not, the summer season starts soon. And since our team is starting to bond and really come together, we're probably going to dominate then. To commemorate this, the team will be renamed from the Pasadena Steamers to some new name, something that's dirty and can't be mentioned here.

Formula 1: This is the best sport ever. I will not even bother to debate this. My current ranking of sports goes something like this: 1. Formula 1; 2(T) College Football; 2(T) NFL Football; 4. MMA fighting; and that's it. Baseball is too boring, except for the post-season. Basketball is poorly officiated (maybe even rigged), so there's no point in watching such a sport where the officials can't make up their minds about what's a foul or not a foul, and what's travelling. Anyway, this has led Kristin to mock me as the worst sports fan ever. I disagree, and tell her that she should just go watch Gossip Girl or something while I have my alone time watching "cars going around in circles." In the end, it's all very therapeutic for me.

Running: I'm in training for a half-marathon, and I'm up to 10-mile runs. My lovely wife refuses to join me. Again, she thinks my activity is lame and boring.

Cinco de Mayo: We were supposed to go to a Cinco de Mayo party on Uno de Mayo, but a certain cousin of Kristin let us down. You know who you are. You better make it up by bringing your A-game next time.

TV: What the heck is going on in "Lost"? And "Jon & Kate Plus 8" ended a few weeks ago. Although check this out. And now we're watching "The Biggest Loser." Of course, I think their measuring system is bogus. They take percentage of total weight lost to determine who's doing the best. They should be taking percentage of excess weight lost. The results are skewed (favoring the ones who start most out of shape), and I'm considering writing a strongly-worded letter to the producers.

Babies: None.

Kristin: Still rocking out on the Guitar Hero.

That's it for now. I'll try to keep writing. Thanks for reading.

VICTORY!!!!!!!!!!!!!

2009-04-14T21:43:00.000-07:00

Tonight was a great night of softball. We won! It was quite exciting. But I'll get to the details of it in a bit. I would have been blogging earlier, to provide you the highest quality blog-ertainment. But Kristin stole the computer from me, and messed around on Facebook for 10 minutes or so while I sat there and waited. So not only will she not put forth the effort to blog, but now she is actively blocking my blogging.

Anyway, tonight's game started like just about all the others. We fell behind early, and we found ourselves in a big hole. And as for me, in the first four innings, I was 0 for 3 with a strikeout, with two of my at-bats ending the inning. So clearly, things were going bad, and particularly so for me.

But then came the fifth inning. The Pasadena Steamers (that's us) staged a monumental rally, pushing 17 runs across the plate, going from 11 down to 6 up. And the most sensational part was my VERY ordinary hit in the middle of the inning. With one out, I had two strikes on me and was just about ready to strike out or ground out for a fourth time in the game, but a teammate yelled out some inspirational words of wisdom (very much like Yogi Berra or some other baseball philosopher), and it put me in the right frame of mind to knock an easy single into right-center field. I don't know if it's possible to even overstate this, but it was miraculous!

In the top of the sixth inning, the other team only scored three runs, so we ended up with a solid win. And as for me, I was thinking about retiring in shame (since my batting performance had been so bad), but now I can almost retire in glory (since I've now doubled my hit total for the season).

That's it for now. But with a win next week, we can keep our playoff hopes alive. I'll let you know how it goes, unless I have four strike-outs next week, which is very possible, in which case I won't.

Easter

2009-04-12T19:36:00.000-07:00

Today, we went over to my aunt's house for Easter. Because it was going to be warm, I wore shorts. The particular pair of shorts I chose were a bit loose around my waist but not too loose that I would need a belt. But then I figured that I'd be dealing with certain hooligans while at my aunt's house - my cousins Domenic and Patrick - and that one of them might try to pants me at some point. So I decided that I'd wear a belt. Sure enough, Patrick tried to pants me (only 10 minutes or so after our arrival) . Disaster avoided due to a little forethought.

Then, at little later, I checked Facebook on my phone. Apparently, I had received a friend request from Christopher Pagano, in Indiana. I don't know this Christopher Pagano. I have nothing in common with him. So as much as it intrigues me that he wants to be my Facebook friend, and as much as I need more friends so as to catch up to Kristin (who always has 10 to 20 more friends than I do), I'm going to have to ignore his friend request.

Finally, a Festivus-style "Feats of Strength" has been in the works with my cousin Steven for quite some time. Over Christmas, he was supposed to do 100 push-ups in 5 minutes, for $100. He claimed at the time that he couldn't do it because he hadn't had time to train because he had been sick leading up to that day. Well, today, he has ready to go. Since he had had extra time to train, I offered him only $20 if he could do 100 in 5 minutes. We went out to the front yard, and he made a go of it. After 25 seconds, he had completed the first 20. By the end of the first minute, he was done with 40. I was starting to get worried that I might lose. Then it took him a minute to do the next 20. At this point, he had 3 minutes to do 40 more. Well, the next 10 push-ups took him quite a bit of time, and the next 10 even more, and the next 10 even more. With 30 seconds left, he had 10 to go. He made a valiant try, but most of his final push-ups didn't meet the technical requirements of a push-up, such that most were excluded. And as time ran out, our official counter (cousin Patrick) had him at 93. So close, yet so far! Sorry Steven, good luck next time. However, the major question is what should be the next event for the Feats of Strength. I'm thinking of making him run a 10k in under 50 minutes next Christmas. I think that would be fair. Any other suggestions?

A Vicious Pine Cone?

2009-04-04T20:06:00.000-07:00

We spent a lovely day at the bar, watching Michigan St. beat UConn, helping Kristin clinch a win in her office's NCAA college basketball tournament bracket. We then watched a little of the Carolina-Villanova game. But when we realized it was going to be a blowout, we took off. We walked back to my car, got in, and closed the doors. And then the back window shattered.

The result was this:

So the moral of the story is that bird crap isn't the only thing you have to worry about when you park under trees. Also, if anyone is to be blamed, it's probably Obama.

One Cookie

2009-04-02T18:47:00.000-07:00

Yesterday, I made chocolate chip cookies after dinner (M&M cookies, to be precise). It was really one of my lesser performances in making cookies. The result was the following cookie (singular):

Well, I realize that this wasn't one of my better performances. However, from it sprang an opportunity. Normally, when there are cookies, Kristin tries to limit me to one cookie per day (knowing that I'll eat four anyway). But with this cookie, I can eat the whole thing and still technically fall within her regulations.

Victory acheived through an unexpected loophole!

Follow-Up Items

2009-04-01T18:42:00.000-07:00

Connect 4: Having played upwards of 1000 games starting in January, I finally quit a few weeks ago. It was quite a drain on my time.

Softball: Nothing good to report. We are 1-1 in our last two games, but my hitting prowess is regressing. It's quite embarrassing. I'd consider quitting for the sake of the team, but I don't want to be a quitter.

Wrist Fat: I am now convinced that this is more real than ever. I've really picked up the pace and the distance in my running, and I can feel that I've lost a bunch of weight. I've even gone down one belt size. But when I went to weigh myself yesterday, I had lost only two pounds since early January. So it's pretty evident at this point that all the weight from my waist is going straight to my wrist. Who would have thought?

Additional Items:
The Formula 1 racing season is on! Feel free to come over at 2am this weekend to watch GP of Malaysia.

Wrist Fat

2009-03-23T20:03:00.000-07:00

Over the holidays, I gained a bit of weight. During the time from Thanksgiving all the way through the Super Bowl, my eating habits were quite prolific.

Anyway, since that time, I've dialed back on the calories just a bit, and picked up the pace and increased the distances in my running. And the results have been positive. I can see that I've definitely lost some weight; I've even moved to the next hole on my belt.

However, as my waistline has shrunk a little, a disturbing development has occurred almost simultaneously. Last week, my watch became very uncomfortable on my wrist. It was suddenly way too tight.

Basically, my wrist had gotten fat. Is it even possible to get fat in the wrist? Will friends and family now start claiming that it looks like I've packed on some pounds in the wrist area?

Kristin's "Gambling Habit"

2009-03-15T15:09:00.000-07:00

I have a friend. Let's call him "Matt." Matt has a slight addiction to gambling, and thus Las Vegas. Whenever Matt is in a casino, it's not possible for him to walk from A to B without first stopping at every other blackjack table, roulette wheel, etc. Along the way, he can potentially lose hundreds of dollars. Because Matt is so prolific in Vegas, the casinos "invite" him back with complimentary rooms. Matt takes advantage of Vegas' invitation and then proceeds to lose more money while gambling. It's not something I could do, but at least he's having fun, and that's what counts.

I also have a wife. Let's call her Kristin. Kristin has a slight addiction to shopping. There are certain stores (Banana Republic, to name the biggest offender) at which she shops so much that they like to invite her back, through coupons, discounts, etc. It seems she's going back every week to take advantage of "so many great deals." And unfortunately, it never ends. Just when she thinks she has everything she needs, she finds something new on the rack. And even though she doesn't need it (and I might even argue that she doesn't even want it, considering the number of times she will eventually wear it), she has to buy it, because it's such a great deal.

So I guess my question is whether there is much difference in the way casinos and retailers operate. They lure you in by promising something for free (a free hotel room, or 35% off your next purchase), only to have you spend money on something that is of little or no value to you. Anyway, these are just my thoughts. Everyone has their own little addictions, I guess.

"Lost" - Spoiler Alert

2009-03-11T13:19:00.000-07:00

This week, it seems a new episode of Lost will not air. So I just thought I'd recap the last episode and make my prediction for the outcome of the show.

In last week's episode (March 4), the island finally stopped traveling in time, and so did the survivors (Sawyer, Jin, Julliete, etc). Apparently, when this happened, they were stuck in 1974. Sawyer and the gang ended up joining the Dharma Initiative, which was in full effect at that time. At the end of the episode, Jin found Jack, Kate, Hurley, Sun, and whoever else had finally come back to the island. It was a reunion three years in the making.

So here's my prediction. Since they will all be part of the Dharma Initiative, I think they are all going to die at the hands of the Ben Linus and the rest of "the others." (We already know that Ben Linus and the others killed off the Dharma Initiative.) In fact, this is the only ending that would satisfy me. I'm really tired of happy endings, and I want to see the bad guy win just once.

Victory On The Diamond

2009-03-11T13:13:00.000-07:00

Yesterday, our team eked out a miraculous come-from-behind victory in the last inning. In a low-scoring game, we gave up 8 runs in the bottom half of the second-to-last inning, to go from up by 1 to down by 7. However, in the top half of the last inning, we scored 10 runs in an amazing rally. And in the bottom half of the inning, we held the other team scoreless.

It was unexpected. It was miraculous. It was beautiful.

As for my contribution, I reached base 2 out of 4 plate appearances, lowering my on-base percentage to .600. And I went 1 for 4, with a hit that just squeaked into the outfield. So I am now batting a pathetic .125. (I'm still looking for a batting cage to go to.)

But we did win, and that is what's most important. Of course, right now, I'm really sore. I really shouldn't be running the bases like that. I'm going to hurt myself fairly soon, and it's going to be quite embarrassing (or impressive, depending on your perspective).

Car Accident

2009-03-05T12:51:00.000-08:00

Yesterday, Kristin drove my car to work. On her way out of the parking lot, a guy driving a pick-up truck hit her head-on. At the time, the guy was messing around on his cell phone and not paying attention, while Kristin was completely stopped. Based on what Kristin said last night, my guess is that the guy was going about 2 mph. When she got home, Kristin was not happy at all. She felt bad, and mad. And the front license plate on my car was barely hanging on. Beyond that, though, there wasn't much damage. We'll take it to the body shop this weekend and see what they have to say.

So I guess this is a slight stroke of bad luck. Oh well, what can you do?

However, there are two things to mention regarding this situation:

My car has now been in two accidents at an average speed of -1 mph. In the first one, I hit the corner of a wall while backing up. That one cost me about $650 to fix. Hopefully, this one will cost less.
Since Kristin is feeling bad about this, I wonder if I can parlay this into a piece of cheesecake this weekend (I'm kind of burned out from carrot cake right now). Probably not, because she doesn't feel THAT bad.

Well, I guess this is a lose-lose for me.

Three Posts In One

2009-03-04T08:23:00.000-08:00

Lots to discuss today. I've got three major items, and I'll start with the least important first.

Softball: Yesterday, our team lost for the second straight game. We are now 0-2. However, there was something to be gained from this outing. We were down 19-3 in the bottom of the fifth, when we staged a rally. We scored 11 runs in that inning to bring the score to 19-14. We gave up two runs in the top of the sixth to fall behind 21-14. And in the bottom of the sixth, we scored six runs, to lose by only one. We could have won the game. We had been down by two with no outs, but our rally faltered. So sad. On a personal note, I reached base all four times I stepped up to the plate. I had two walks (I've been told it's bad form to take pitches in a softball game, so I'll have to re-evaluate for next week), and reached base two other times on infield errors. At least I made contact (although it wasn't all that solid). I also scored three times and had an RBI. So it was a definite improvement on last week. My cumulative batting average is 0.0000 (0-4), but my on-base percentage is now a stellar .667 (4-6).

Blogging: It seems my cousin Pam Sciarra has started her own blog. Apparently, I was her inspiration. (The fact that I am inspiring anyone to do anything is alarming.) This blog will have a link to hers as soon as authorized.

New People: And much more important than the previous two items, Ava Lyn Freiburg was born yesterday morning after something like 26 hours of labor. Congratulations to John and Cheryl! In my humble opinion, Ava looks just like her grandmother, Lynda Cabigas. Good luck to Ava in navigating this crazy world.

Anyway, that's it for now. I hope you're all doing well.

Softball

2009-02-25T12:49:00.000-08:00

On Saturday, Kristin and I met up for dinner with Kristin's brother Garrett and cousin Pat. During the dinner, Pat mentioned that he was part of a softball team and said they could use a couple extra players for the team. So I emailed him on Monday, and he said to show up on Tuesday night at the field near the Rose Bowl.

I was totally excited, for many reasons. I've never been in a softball league. (I've also never been in a bowling league either, and so I need to join one of those as well.) It would be really fun to play/compete. I might get some exercise. I might even meet some cool people. Most importantly, it would be the opportunity to end my 0 for 35 batting streak (going back to T-ball, circa 1987). Also, for Kristin's sake, it would be my chance to get some practice in before having kids, so that if we have a son someday, I would not be the worst person in the world to teach him how to throw/catch/hit a baseball. (My brother and sister-in-law are currently going through deliberations as to whether I should be allowed sports time with my nephew.)

Anyway, back to the point. Yesterday was the first game of the league. During lunch, I went to Big 5 and got some cleats. I showed up at the field, and we played the game. I won't discuss the final outcome of the game, since that's not important to the story. But for me, I went 0 for 2 with two strikeouts. I struck out twice on four pitches total (each at-bat starts with 1 ball and 1 strike). On each pitch, I swung and missed (badly).

So the moral of the story is this: I am now trying to end an 0 for 37 streak. Very embarrassing!

Also, can anyone recommend a good batting cage in the Santa Monica area? I need to get my timing down.

Nothing Going On

2009-02-21T11:31:00.000-08:00

I've had nothing to discuss lately because there's not much going on here in Pagano-land. Sports are in a dry spell (football is over, and I refuse to acknowledge the existence of basketball). Nothing else exciting is happening with us. Just working, eating, sleeping, and sometimes even exercising.

That's all I've got for now.

Connect Four and Other Stuff

2009-02-16T17:41:00.000-08:00

Connect Four was a game I enjoyed greatly as a kid. So when I noticed an application for my iPhone called Four Free (the free version of Connect Four), I downloaded it. This was just over six weeks ago, on January 3.

I spent a little time playing the computer on easy. Then I moved up to medium. Then I moved up to hard. Then, I decided that my goal was to be able to win twice as many games as the computer. But at this point, I was already 15-20 wins behind such an accomplishment. I didn't think it would be too tough, so I kept playing and kept playing and kept playing, and I was obsessed.

By the end of January, Kristin was getting upset with me. By now, I was upwards of 40 straight wins behind my goal. So clearly, I wasn't even going in the right direction. But I told her I would quit, and so I erased the history.

Then, a few days later, out of boredom, I picked it up again. This time, my goal was to win twice the amount of games as the computer, plus 40 on top of that, to make up for my previous shortfall. I kept playing more and more. On occasion, I'd get hot and go on a run, and cut my deficit to 20, but then I'd go on a short losing streak, and have all my progress wiped out.

Well, this weekend, I finally did it. I made a run to cut the deficit back down to 30 and picked up some much needed confidence. Then I got it back down to 20, only to lose some ground. And then finally, I went on a phenomenal streak, and achieved my goal! At that moment, I was so very proud of myself. Of course, I had probably played 900 games or so in total, so that's nothing to be proud of. But I have now put the game down for good, or at least until I get bored again.

In other news, Kristin and I took a trip up to San Francisco this weekend. Our plan was to see the city and friends. I would post pictures here, but Kristin didn't bring the camera. (So much for NEEDING a new 10-megapixel camera.)

I did take this picture of the Marina Lounge:
This was my favorite bar when I lived up there. It was very small, open by 9am on Sundays, and patronized only by uncool people like me. And it was great!

Scared To Death

2009-02-06T18:41:00.001-08:00

Holy Crap!

I just read the most disturbing thing I've seen in a long time. Please re-read my last post, and then read Cheryl's (Kristin's best friend) comment about the need for Kristin and I to have a daughter so that our daughter and Cheryl & John's daughter could grow up together and be BFFs (that's "Best Friends Forever" for all you people over 40) and go shopping together.

I'm not necessarily sure what caused this, but this freaked me out! (Possibly because I'm drunk on a Friday night after 1.25 Jack & Cokes while sitting at home waiting for Kristin to come home from work so we can go out to dinner.) I mean, we're not quite ready to have kids. But the very notion that we would have a daughter who would grow up to be Cheryl/John's daughter's best friend, and that they would feed off each other in their shopping habits, well I can only say WOW! That just blows my mind!

To put this in perspective, Kristin is a very smart, rational, and reasonable person. Her biggest weakness is her motivation to shop (although she would say that's her greatest strength). Cheryl is similar.

But when they get together, you can throw all that reasonableness out the window, and what you would call a small weakness (in isolation) becomes a death spiral to one's life savings. I mean, if we had a daughter as our first child and she became BFF with Cheryl's daughter, not only would they shop together, but they would probably want to help plan each others' weddings, and that would get completely out of hand. I don't have that kind of money, and I don't plan on it either.

I don't know what to do. Right now, I'm freaked out. I guess it's good that I started drinking. I better keep drinking. By the time I finish this drink, I'll probably be passed out (I get my tolerance for alcohol from my mother), and that will be a good thing.

Playing Catch

2009-02-06T11:39:00.000-08:00

Yesterday, Kristin noticed how long my hair is. (It's really not that long, but it's a little longer than usual. I would have gotten it cut a couple weeks ago, but we had a trip to Utah coming up, and so I didn't want my head to get too cold because my hair was too short. Seriously, I'm not joking.) Anyway, Kristin also noticed that my grays hairs were becoming more prominent (as is always the case when my hair gets longer). She made some comment that I was getting old and that when we had kids (TBD) I would be too old to even play catch with them. This is ridiculous. First of all, I will not be too old if we don't have kids until I'm 35 or whatever the age is. But second, if I can't play catch with my kids, it'll because I have no athletic ability whatsoever.

Notes From The Weekend

2009-02-02T16:44:00.000-08:00

So this last week, Kristin and I went skiing in Utah with the Nunnellys. This is the fourth time we've gone, and it's usually a good trip. I say "usually" because of past events (i.e. a dislocated knee cap two years ago). Anyway, we flew out on Wednesday night.

On Thursday, Randy & Garrett went skiing, while I stayed in while Kristin had some work that needed to be done.

On Friday, we braved the cold and hit the slopes. Because of my awesome note-taking ability, I was able to remember the proper techniques and weight distribution. I quickly go up to speed and comfortable. I had a great day of skiing. We then had lunch, had a few more runs, and called it a day.

Saturday, however, was totally different. All that confidence and skill I had built up disappeared immediately. I simply didn't have it. Suddenly, turning right became an impossible challenge. We skied in the morning. At lunch, I called it a day. I got off the mountain in one piece. Later, as I was taking off my boots, I noticed that the clamps on the boots had come undone. I wonder if this is what caused my crappiness to be exacerbated that day. Oh well, I shouldn't blame my equipment.

In other Utah ski trip news, we had a nice discussion about how curse words are not allowed in the Nunnelly household. Then, in that same discussion, a number of curse words were thrown out there all willy-nilly. Let's just say that I now have five get-out-of-jail-free cards, which I can use in their presence at my discretion. I can't wait to throw out a few four-letter words the next time I see Carol and Randy. I'm really looking forward to it.

Also, never play games with the Nunnellys. They're all cheaters, especially Garrett and Carol. They can't be trusted to play a fair and honest game. If you do decide to ever play any game with them, be ready to cheat yourself or you'll be at a decided disadvantage.

Finally, we got home just in time for the Super Bowl. I was rooting hard for the Cardinals, as they were the underdog, and I don't much care for the Steelers. Anyway, as I mentioned before, I took a rooting interest in 9 of the previous 10 NFL playoff games this year. In all 9, I lost. So in a totally winnable game, and with the Cardinals ahead (miraculously) with only 3 minutes to go, they blew it. I'm not going to take responsibility for their loss, but maybe things might have been different had I rooted for the Steelers. Anyway, I went 0 for 10 this year. In some of those games, I took the favorite. In some, I took the underdog. Therefore, on average, I had a 50% chance of success in every game. Using those percentages, the odds of going 0 for 10 are about 1 in a 1000 (.5 ^ 10 = 0.098%). I really do stink at picking winners in football. Unfortunately, as football is now over, you won't be able to put my anti-talent to work for all your gambling needs.

Ski trip - cursing not allowed in the Nunnelly household except when
they decide to curse, I am now allowed five  curse words; cheating
during apples to apples; poor skiing on day 2;
Odds of going winless in NFL playoffs - 1/1000

Going Skiing

2009-01-26T18:17:00.000-08:00

Tomorrow, Kristin and I (and the rest of the Nunnellys) are flying to Utah to go skiing. We will be there until Sunday, arriving home just as the Super Bowl starts. (A big shout-out to Randy for realizing that our flight home was during the Super Bowl and making the appropriate changes to our flight schedule.)

Anyway, as we'll be out of town over the next few days, I shall not be posting. What I shall be doing is getting scared to death with each run down the mountain. To ensure that I don't fall too much or hurt myself, I wrote out some notes last year to help me remember weight distribution as well as other necessary techniques. Just so you know how screwed I am, I thought I'd post them for your viewing.

Traversing the Mountain:

Weight on downhill ski
Lean forward in boots

Turning:

Move weight to uphill ski (outside)
Lean forward on uphill ski
Push toes down on uphill ski
Start turn
Turn hips
Start turning downhill ski
Lean downhill ski toward turn
Bring outside hand around fully
Outside hand (not downhill hand) should be lower than uphill hand
Look up, not down toward skis

Other:

Don't look down the mountain
Look at where I want to go

First, I will be studying these on the plane ride to Utah. And second, someone who has to actually think through this many things is in a bad spot. If you can spare a thought of pity for me, please do so.

Thanks.

Philippe's

2009-01-26T18:13:00.000-08:00

Today, I met up with a friend to discuss business. We met up at Philippe's, in downtown LA, right across the street from Union Station. I had a french dip, some macaroni salad, and chocolate cream pie. It was excellent.

If you have never been to Philippe's, shame on you!

If you have but don't like it, that is not comprehensible, and you should reevaluate your priorities, principles, and tastes in this world!

Bride Wars (Spoiler Alert)

2009-01-25T17:53:00.000-08:00

Kristin is a very responsible and reasonable human being (except when it comes to shopping, in which case all reason and logic get thrown out the window). Her friend Cheryl is also a very reasonable person (also except when it comes to shopping).

However, when they get together, they start feeding off each other, and all you can do is hold on for your life. One aspect of their relationship where things got out of hand was in the planning of both their weddings. These are two women who spent a lot of time growing up and in their early adult years dreaming about their respective special days. So when the new movie Bride Wars came out, it was only natural that Kristin and Cheryl get together to watch. Now, just to be clear, this is not a documentary based loosely on Kristin/Cheryl's planning of their weddings, although it could probably pass for it. More precisely, it's a crappy romantic comedy based on two best friends who end of having their weddings on the same day in the same place and fighting each other over it.

So Kristin and Cheryl set up a time/place to meet to watch the movie, for some much-needed "bonding time." And of course, the husbands got dragged along. We met at the Century City mall. Anyway, before discussing the movie, a few notes about the Century City mall.

First, this is the most technologically-advanced parking lot, with censors above each parking spot, and there's a light which tells you if the spot is open or taken. Therefore, you can see all the way down a row without driving down that row. Amazing!
The mall is east of the 405. Kristin and I do not travel east of the 405 on weekends for much. Cheryl and John should consider themselves lucky.
A vendor was selling shamwows. Click here to learn more, as it's truly an amazing invention. It holds 20 times its weight in liquid. And it's made in Germany, because the Germans always make good stuff.

Anyway, on to the movie. It's all right and funny in parts. However, the plot has a few BIG holes in it:

First, Emma and her fiance decide in the final scene (after their wedding has begun) that they aren't right for each other anymore. Prior to this, the plot BARELY alluded to this, so this scene felt like a big stretch.
Second, the wedding planner (Marion St. Clare, played brilliantly by Candice Bergen, formerly of "Murphy Brown," who bore a child out of wedlock in the show, which was viewed unfavorably by then Vice President Dan Quayle, who couldn't spell the plural of the word "potato") originally booked Emma and Liv to weddings during the first and last week of June at the Plaza, respectively. Through some mix-up (her admin screwed up), Emma and Liv end up having both their weddings booked on the same date in June. This is a major screw-up! Am I really to believe that a wedding planner, whose only asset is her reputation and good name, wouldn't fix this? Really?!?! Personally, who would use this wedding planner after something like this happened? No one would. Therefore, the rest of the movie from that point forward (something like 20 minutes in) isn't worth watching because it's not at all believable.
Also, I'm not happy that matinee tickets are $10 a piece. It's a recession, and I think AMC Theater management had better get its act together and lower prices.

Happy Birthday...

2009-01-22T14:44:00.000-08:00

To our silent yet effective co-blogger.

Even though her words of wisdom have not been read on this blog, she is an insightful and intelligent and inspirational figure!

Anyway, my beautiful wife turns a very young [censored] years old today. She is celebrating by going to dinner with the writer of this great blog.

Losing Our Way

2009-01-21T19:16:00.000-08:00

So maybe you've noticed, or maybe you haven't, but posts have been few and far between lately. I'm not sure what it is exactly - whether I've lost my motivation or just simply run out of ideas - but something has definitely changed of late. So where do we go from here? It's definitely time to start looking inward.

Obviously, the goal was to build readership before child #1 (TBD) arrives. But it's a lot of effort to keep you reading for that long, and I'm just a big nerd who's been writing about carrot cake and microsoft excel.

Maybe it's time for a sabbatical. I don't know; I just don't know. But I'll let you know when I figure it out.

Anyway, if you don't hear from me before the Super Bowl, I'm rooting for the Cardinals. So you might as well go ahead and bet it all on the Steelers. (Again, beware of the jinx, reverse jinx, and double-reverse jinx.)

NFL Gambling

2009-01-16T14:26:00.000-08:00

Use at your own risk:

Over the last two weekends, there have been 8 NFL playoff games. In 7 of them, I took a rooting interest (I didn't have time to watch the Viking vs. Eagles). In all 7 of them, I have lost. Therefore, if you feel the need to bet this weekend, pick the Cardinals and the Steelers, because I will be rooting for the Eagles and the Ravens.

Of course, by writing this, I may be reverse-jinxing myself. But just so you know, as a little bit of history, a few years ago, I went 0-11 in NFL playoff picks. So I am historically bad.

Important Changes in the Pagano Household

2009-01-13T19:54:00.001-08:00

(No, we're not having kids yet.)

Last Friday, Kristin got promoted to Brand Manager at Activision. It seems all her efforts to play the drums have paid off. Anyway, it's been obvious for a long time that she was doing really well there and that everyone liked her. (It's a good thing I have her under a lifetime contract.) So with "talent planning" coming to a conclusion, management decided to reward her for her efforts.

With such a move, it has become entirely evident to me that things should change in our household as well. I think you would all agree that Kristin is the big winner in our family, and that I should just pack it in, quit my job, and let her be the breadwinner. Seriously, how could I disagree with such a notion? When the children arrive (TBD), I will be volunteering my services to stay home with them.

I mean, this isn't just a good move for us; it's a good move for women everywhere, as she helps Sarah Palin and Hillary Clinton and Condi break through that glass ceiling.

A Pair of Jeans

2009-01-09T11:11:00.000-08:00

Yesterday marked the end of the 2008 college football season. As per our bet, and with Texas less than 8 spots behind USC (although they did indeed finish behind), Kristin can go buy herself a pair of jeans. While it may seem that I have actually lost the bet, the end result is that this should have zero net effect on Kristin's total jeans collection, and thus zero monetary effect. Here's why:

Whenever Kristin goes out and buys an article of clothing, it is always because she "needs" it. Never has she bought something merely because she simply wants it. So with her buying this pair of jeans (which she may or may not need), her future need for jeans should decrease by one pair. (I should have probably drawn some supply and demand curves here for your reference.)

Therefore, while in the short-term there may be an extra pair of jeans and a related cost, in the long-term this shall have no net effect on Kristin's jeans collection or our finances. Therefore, while I may have technically lost the bet, I really lose nothing, unless of course she's been lying to me all along about her "need" for clothes.

On TV Tonight

2009-01-04T20:28:00.000-08:00

Today, Monday, January 5, is a HUGE day for TV. There are six hours of quality television conveniently wrapped into three programs.

The Tostitos Fiesta Bowl: First, stick it to the corporate sponsor by opening up a bag of Doritos or Fritos or Cheetos during the game. Second, go to the other TV, so that you are not watching it with a UT alum. You'll avoid not only the play-by-play commentary but also the complaints about being left out of the BCS championship game.
Gossip Girl: This show sucks, and it is beneath the dignity of this blog to speak positively about it. I mean, Kristin loves it, and will be watching it intently, and will be saying every other commercial break "XOXO, Gossip Girl." But that doesn't mean that this show isn't one big pile of ....
John & Kate Plus Eight: In the upcoming season, it seems the big event is that the Gosselins move to a bigger house. While that may be the issue promoted in all their commercials, they should be highlighting what's going on with the children. (The twins Mady and Cara are now eight years old, while the sextuplets will be five in May.) Anyway, the big issue, I think, is what's going to happen with the sextuplet boys. I think it's glaringly obvious that both Joel and Collin are punks, and it's only a matter of time before they start picking on Aaden. I can only hope it starts this season, so they can show Kate flying off the handle and going crazy and yelling at everyone.

New Tag Line

2009-01-01T18:09:00.000-08:00

I just want to take this opportunity to thank new loyal reader Travis Hockersmith for providing our new tag line (see above). Aside from being The Best Blog Ever, we are now Inspirational Yet Alarmingly Useless. I believe that sums up perfectly the point of this blog.

Google Analytics

2008-12-28T18:41:00.000-08:00

Because we wish to present the highest quality service to all our readers, we have now installed Google Analytics to the blog. This will allow us to track the volume and source of our readership and thus tailor our offerings in a more efficient manner.

For those of you Fourth Amendment / privacy-loving crazy liberals, have no fear. Your secrets are still safe with me, especially since I won't have access to them. Also, I'm not the government, so the Fourth Amendment does not apply here.

Special thanks to Cheryl Freiburg for her expertise in helping set this up. (However, this is not enough to merit an additional award at this time.)

Also, special thanks to Amanda Johnson. Your site is the #1 referrer!

New Year's Resolutions

2008-12-28T11:05:00.000-08:00

NONE!

(We here at The Best Blog Ever never admit to any of our deficiencies, and nor should you.)

Happy New Year to you all.

UFC 92 Results

2008-12-28T08:46:00.001-08:00

UFC 92 was last night. Kristin and I were out and about, so I didn't have a chance to watch it. But it was a truly great fight card:

Forrest Griffin vs. Rashad Evans for the Light Heavyweight title
Nogueira vs. Frank Mir
Rampage Jackson vs. Wanderlei Silva

I won't mention the results here in case you still plan on watching, but I heard there were some great fights. Even if you don't like MMA, you should still check out the results. Highlights of the undercard are here. And here is the main event.

ENJOY.

Growth & Branding

2008-12-26T11:12:00.000-08:00

Caution: This could be a very nerdy post.

I started this blog in early September with this post. Through word of mouth and some aggressive marketing (me begging people to read), blog readership is at an all-time high (20+ readers). Who knew this blog would have such a far-reaching audience? But with this blog touching all parts of the blogosphere, some issues obviously arise.

When you look at the corporate world, such rapid growth can lead to multiple problems. One is expanding so quickly that you build too much capacity. Then, when the industry retrenches, you have a lot of costly idle capacity. Fortunately, blogging is very scalable, so we don't have that problem.

The second issue is developing your market. Do you want to be a producer for the masses, or do you pick a niche and try to service that group extremely well? If you try to be a producer for the masses and be all things to all people, it's very possible that you serve none of them very well. You end up being in a low-margin business with high fixed costs. And when the market changes, you can't be very nimble. On the other hand, if you want to be a niche player, you have to do at least one thing better than all your competitors for one specific segment of the market. There can be high margins. But such high margins quickly attract competitors. And if you're entire business is dependent upon one small market, bad things can happen quickly if you lose that market, or the market shrinks, or whatever.

So, maybe you can see my quandary. I can either continue aggressively marketing this blog to all. In the short-term, I will likely gain more readers. But there's a good chance many of them won't like it, and they will spread bad word of mouth to other potential readers, thus diluting the brand. Or, I can be very selective in choosing prospects, discussing the blog only at the right time and only with the right people, and hopefully building up an audience that is smaller but more loyal (and creating great brand awareness and recognition).

The question is how I want this blog to be seen by (potential) readers. Do I want a select few to really love it, or do I want the masses to just like it? Obviously, this is an issue that someone in marketing should be able to solve. So I asked Kristin Pagano (Associate Brand Manager of Guitar Hero at Activision, and also my wife) what she thought about these branding issues, and she said "You're a dork." So this problem isn't going to be solved by a professional.

Oh well, all that for nothing. I guess I'll just keep doing what I've been doing. Never mind this post.

Random Thoughts From Christmas

2008-12-26T09:47:00.000-08:00

Christmas has come and gone. All that build-up, and it's over so fast. So with that, let's recap some of the major issues topics from the last two days:

Prosciutto is the best of all the salted cured meats. This is not debatable.
The best Christmas gift I received was some packets of salt. They were wrapped, and from Santa. You really never know when you're going to be eating a steak, and there will be no salt on the table. And when that happens, the Nunnellys will mock you for years to come. It's best to come prepared with your own salt.
Guitar Hero World Tour is a big hit, if you can get someone to sing. Chris Corradini made an excellent singer on Christmas Eve. However, yesterday, I took one for the team and belted out "Hotel California" in a very unforgettable ear-splitting performance.
Another phenomenal Christmas gift was from my cousin Domenic to my Aunt Lucretia. She came strolling in yesterday in her brand new Neil Diamond jacket. She wore it with great pride. Truly amazing.
The second annual Feats of Strength was canceled. Apparently, my cousin Steven had been sick the week prior and had not had a chance to practice. He was supposed to do 100 push-ups in 5 minutes, for $100. He bowed out gracefully.
My cousin Domenic seems to have consumed a whole bottle of Jack Daniels on his own. Good job, and keep up the good work.
My cousin Pam is considering starting her own blog. I think she'll be using it mostly to post pictures of her kids Drew and Addison. Whatever the use, I'd like to think that I was her inspiration.
For years, we have played Trivial Pursuit on Christmas. I can't believe it has taken so long for me to realize this, but it's a really bad idea to let a bunch of mostly Italians (who already yell at each other most of the time) try to play a game like this. There is always so much yelling going on, it's maddening. SERENITY NOW!
Next year, we're playing Battleship.

Moms To Start Reading

2008-12-21T09:13:00.000-08:00

I may have had a breakthrough in getting my mom and my mother-in-law to read the blog. Last night, I sent them both an email with the link to the blog. Now, there are no excuses (although I'm sure I'll be hearing shortly that they "accidentally" deleted the email). If only they could actually bookmark the site (assuming they know what bookmarks or favorites are). Anyway, the next time I see them, they will need to prove that they actually read the blog. So as to ensure their loyalty, I am including in this post a code word.

The code word is : tippy toe.

Happy Festivus

2008-12-21T09:09:00.000-08:00

Last night, Kristin reminded me that I should wish all my readers good tidings during this holiday season. So as not to offend anyone and/or their religious beliefs/non-beliefs, we here at the blog need to remain a bit generic.

So we will wish you a Happy Festivus. If you don't know what Festivus is, shame on you! Go look it up right now! I can divulge that it includes a pole (as opposed to a Christmas tree) with a high strength-to-weight ratio, the feats of strength (likely a wrestling match), and the airing of the grievances (very common at an Italian family Christmas).

Happy Festivus everyone!

Adventures In Selling A Car

2008-12-17T13:01:00.001-08:00

Kristin and I have been thinking about acquiring a new car. Both our cars are six years old. They both work. But they are requiring a little bit more in maintenance costs every year. Both would need new timing belts soon (or "training wheels," as Kristin calls them). So when all was said and done (car payment minus lower maintenance costs), it wouldn't be all that expensive to lease a new car. Plus, the joy of driving a brand new shiny automobile. But first, we'd need to see what my car would fetch.

On Sunday, I checked Kelley Blue Book, and the trade-in value of my car was $6700. This was a little disappointing, but not altogether unexpected. The private resale value was around $8-9k. This still wasn't what I wanted to get for it, but no big deal. I then went to the Infiniti dealership to look at the G35's. While talking to the salesman about my current car, he indicated that they could do a trade-in, but Carmax would give me a better deal, probably closer to the private-party resale value than the blue book value.

So after a little more car shopping that day, we went to Carmax. We went through the whole process, then waited while the appraiser did his thing. After an hour, the representative came back to the office where we were waiting and told us that the car was in great condition (great exterior, great interior, great structurally, great engine). So I expected a solid offer well above the $6700 quoted by KBB. He then proceeded to offer us $4000. I was appalled. Kristin was ready to throw something at someone's head.

Anyway, after getting an explanation from the appraiser, we left and drove to the Audi dealership. After talking with the salesman, and after he had "his guy" inspect my car, they came back and offered us only $2600 for it. Who knew I was driving such a jalopy?!?!?

(This isn't my actual jalopy, just a picture of one found on wikipedia. A picture of my car has not been included so as to protect its identity.)

Anyway, to commemorate my jalopy, please go here. This is an oldie but goody. It's uncensored, so if you don't like bad words, you shouldn't watch. If you do like bad words, you should watch multiple times.

To end, a decision has been made to keep my jalopy (I really like saying that word) for a little while longer and completely run it into the ground.

Kristin's One Post

2008-12-14T15:33:00.001-08:00

There has been a lot of confusion about some remarks I've made about Kristin never having posted. Multiple readers have pointed out that Kristin did indeed post a single time. Actually, that was me.

I would hate for Kristin to be given credit for something she didn't do, and so would she.

Trying To Get More Parents To Read This Blog

2008-12-14T10:03:00.001-08:00

Yesterday, we went to my cousin's daughter's baptism. Afterward, we saw Kristin's parents at their place in Newport. It was an excellent opportunity to re-advertise this blog to "the older generation."

At the baptism, I tried to convince my mom and my aunt that they should be reading the blog. My mom said she couldn't read the blog because she couldn't figure out how to find it. As I mentioned in last week's post, she wouldn't be able to figure out how to type in a simple URL. When I mentioned that she could just put it in her favorites, she had no clue what I was talking about. Then, to deflect criticism, she commented that I "must have too much time on my hands." Too predictable. As for my aunt, after she boasted that she indeed knew how to use the internet, she pretty much admitted that she didn't know how to use the internet when she mentioned that it would be too difficult for her to find.

At the Nunnelly residence, we pulled up the blog for Kristin's mother to read. Before, she indicated that it was just too hard for her to find on the internet. Anyway, she read through the blog and DID NOT LIKE IT AT ALL. (Actually, she kind of enjoyed Cheryl's guest post, but she didn't much care for mine.) Can you imagine the disappointment and utter shame her relatively-new son-in-law must have felt because his mother-in-law didn't like his musings? At that moment, I considered shutting down the blog for good. I mean, I can understand my mom's reaction: she's an Italian woman, and all she does is yell and have a bad disposition. But Carol Nunnelly, come on!

Oh well, I will try to lift my spirits and summon the courage to keep going. Hopefully, this blog will continue its rich tradition of excellence in perpetuity. But if it does not, you can trace its demise back to yesterday, December 13, 2008. And if that happens, I apologize, but you know ultimately whom to blame.

Additional Award

2008-12-12T15:13:00.000-08:00

Believe it or not, but we found additional dollars in the 2008 operating budget. Therefore, we can give out just one more award. So without further adieu:

Best (fill in the blank): Cheryl Freiburg

Congratulations, Cheryl, I always knew you could do it!

Not Happy About Not Winning

2008-12-12T15:12:00.000-08:00

Guest Post by Cheryl Freiburg:

Hey everyone, Cheryl (Cabigas) Freiburg, guest-blogger of the day :) Now, for those of you who have read the previous post, you see that my mother has won an award. So not fair! I think the awards committee (Chris) has a preference for CPA's or something. That or he realizes that my mom now works for the "Man" and is trying to get in good with the IRS. Hmmmm....

So anyway, I was given a chance to indicate why I deserve an award. So let's get right down to it.

1) My mom is your best new reader. Without me she wouldn't even know about your blog (let alone what the word "blog" means!)

2) Loyal reader - yeah yeah yeah, you're all loyal readers. But is anyone else as big of a dork as I am to put a feed of Chris's bog on your iGoogle home page? I know, I should be embarrassed, but I'm not. I'm that dork.

3) Quality trumps quantity - so yeah, maybe other people comment more than I do (I'm talking to you Logan!), but I'm telling you it's all about quality of the comment over the quantity!

4) A little history for those of you who are not as big a dork as I am (reference #2 above)... So yesterday I notice that Chris has posted a blog that there is an official name change from "Chris & Kristin Pagano's Blog" to "Chris Pagano's Blog" - so of course like the loyal reader I am, I click on the link to see that the blog post has been removed! Later that day, I get the following email from Chris:

"Was my blog post today that Kristin made me delete bad? Should I have left it up? Thanks for your objective opinion."

So of course, I'm thinking, well, if my objective opinion is important enough to be sought, then obviously I am like the Mr. Miyagi to Chris's Daniel-san! This alone makes me worthy of some sort of award!

5) And this is really the most important - this blog was birthed because we put it in his head! Over a nice long dinner conversation about starting a baby blog for our impending arrival, Chris was inspired to begin this wonderful literary masterpiece known as Chris and Kristin Pagano's blog (ok, so a little ass kissing might help, right?). So the blog wouldn't even be here if we never had the discussion about it!

And seriously if I don't get some sort of award after this, well, Chris, I would sleep with one eye open. I know people who know people!

Your loyal reader,
Cheryl

More Awards To Give Out

2008-12-12T12:26:00.000-08:00

Happy Friday everyone. I'm sitting here at my desk during lunch time, so I figured I'd do a quick post.

Now would be an excellent time to give out the second edition of my awards. However, we are now officially in a recession, and there's no money left in the budget to give anything other than a single award. What can I say, times are tight.

So I really put some effort into this, to try to determine who's most deserving. And after much thought, here's the award:

Best New Reader: Lynda Cabigas

Congratulations, Mrs. Cabigas, you have won a non-cash appreciation award from THE BEST BLOG EVER.

Thank you all for playing. As always, we appreciate your support.

Chris & Kristin

2008-12-10T20:03:00.000-08:00

This is my second post today. The first one displeased Kristin. I was trying to exert some pressure on her to post, and I mentioned it in the post. And I changed the title of the blog (to exclude her name). Clearly, she was not pleased. She made some threats, and I blinked. That post was deleted.

Anyway, on to tonight's post. I am stealing the idea for this post from Jennifer's blog. (Who knows, that may even garner her another award at some point.)

Things You Should Know About Chris & Kristin:

Who's older: me (by three years)
Who's taller: tie (or Kristin when I don't stand up straight)
Who's smarter: Kristin (I can't remember anything anymore)
Who's the bigger dork: me
Who's the better driver: me
Who's the better Dyson vacuum cleaner operator: me
Who's the better cook: Kristin
Who makes better chocolate chip cookies: Kristin
Who makes better chocolate chip cookie dough: me
Who eats more: me
Who's the bigger fan of Kelly Clarkson: me
Who's masculinity is now in question: probably me
Who sings better: neither
Who's a fan of the Tennesse Titans even though she now wants them to lose because Vince Young isn't playing: Kristin
Who uses up 95% of the closet for her clothes while her husband gets two feet: Kristin
Who cleans: me
Who has more friends: Kristin (she always has about 15 more on facebook than i do, and i can't catch up)
Who looks more like McLovin: me
Who watches more crappy TV: Kristin (America's Next Top Model, Gossip Girl)
Who's the better blogger: me
Who's "the best blog(ger) ever": me

Saturday, December 6, 2008

2008-12-07T09:22:00.001-08:00

There's a lot of territory to cover in this post, so let's discuss all the major issues:

Kristin went to the mall yesterday. She came home with a new sweater which she had bought for me. Now, if you'll recall an earlier post, Kristin and I had agreed that we would not be exchanging gifts for Christmas. Therefore, she should not have gotten me this "gift." Kristin then indicated that it wasn't for Christmas, that I could have it now. Who knew that you could get around the Christmas gift ban by simply saying something is not for Christmas? So you can see what I'm dealing with when I try to make agreements with Kristin. In some respects, she's like a lawyer always looking for a loophole. From now on, every time we make an agreement, I'm going to need a contract that's two inches thick to cover every contingency so that she can't get around the basic spirit and intent of the agreement.

Then last night, we went to dinner with the Nunnelly boys, Garrett and Patrick. Normally, one might say that they were in rare form, but from what I've seen before, this was a normal game-day performance. We covered lots of ground. Here are some thoughts from the evening:

Both Pat & Garrett indicated that they were fans of this blog. (Seriously, though, can you really find someone who's read the blog who isn't a fan?)
Neither of them were happy that they didn't receive blog awards from me a couple weeks back when I decided to acknowledge certain people. Who could have known that that would have created such a firestorm of controversy? Listen, people, this isn't T-ball; you don't get awards just for showing up! Awards are meted out for outstanding achievement in the field of excellence. If you step up your game, you may be recognized in the future. The question is, what can you do to to be recognized. We'll get to that a little bit later in this post.
Based on last night's events, both Garrett & Pat indicated that today's blog post had to be really good. My apologies, but I don't think I can live up to that standard. I mean, there was a lot of good material from last night's dinner, but I'm not allowed to reproduce much of it (too much sensitive material). In fact, I even wrote down notes this morning of the important items to discuss, but I still don't think I can do enough of what it takes to meet such lofty expectations. So I apologize if I let the two of you down.
With my readership growing to such great levels, I am quite proud of what this fine blog has achieved. More people are reading it than I expected (my expectation was that no one would read it, but it sounds like I may even have at least five readers). Anyway, the only people not reading it are some of the potential grand parents of our first child (TBD). They are either "busy" or not technologically competent enough to type in a simple URL. They even claim that I "have too much time on my hands." You know what, it's going to be their loss. When grandchild #1 comes along, they'll have no idea, as it will be announced here and only here. How do you think they're going to feel when they've been left out of the loop? And they'll have only themselves to blame.

OK, so let's shift gears a bit and discuss what you have to do to win an award from me. Essentially, these awards are handed out only when you help make this blog better. This list is not exhaustive, but here are some things you can do:

Get Kristin to post. We're getting up to 40 posts sooner or later, and Kristin has contributed exactly zero of them. This blog was set up to be for and by both of us. If it's just me, this blog loses a certain amount of credibility. This blog would be more "fair and balanced" if she wrote on a (semi-) consistent schedule. In fact, for every post I write, Kristin reads it, laughs, and comments that I'm a dork. Clearly, I need someone "cooler" than myself for balance. If you can convince Kristin to contribute, you will get an award.
You can comment on my posts. Since I don't know anything about the internet, I have no clue how to see how many people are visiting the blog. So I can only tell who's reading it by your comments (either in the blog itself or via email). Comments within the blog are especially useful because we can generate a sense of "community" that is sorely lacking.
You can guest blog. This blog is about presenting ideas, important ideas. As one man, I can only do so much. If you have something to say, you are more than welcome to say it here. Just send me an email with your post, and I will put it up and indicate that you are the author. You might even realize that you have a special talent and that you should start your own blog. (Garrett and Patrick, I'm looking in your direction.)

It's not me who makes this blog great, but you, my loyal readers (actually, right now, it is me). So let's work together to make this blog something special.

That's it for today.

Little Nacho Libre

2008-12-04T21:10:00.000-08:00

Financial Karma?

2008-12-04T13:00:00.001-08:00

Yesterday
I was reviewing our tax situation yesterday, and I had thought that Kristin and I were going to owe an additional $6k with our tax return. But as I re-ran the numbers, I remembered to add some additional deductions that I had previously forgotten. Those would save us $3k in taxes. So while I wasn't happy to be paying additional tax, I was feeling very good that our payment would be much smaller.

But then I got an email from AT&T regarding my new cell phone service. It indicated that text messaging was not included with my plan and that I was being charged $0.20 for each text (both outgoing and incoming). So I called AT&T to add $5 to my monthly charges so that I'd be covered. This new cost made me feel less happy.

Then, as I was driving home, I went to cash in my winning lottery ticket, and I received $11. Clearly, I was riding high. (And yes, per Logan's suggestion, I did let some of it ride, as the new jackpot is $146MM.)

Then, I went to pick up some dress shoes that I had left at the shoe repair store. I was thinking the total cost would be less than $40, which is more than what we ever paid in Santa Clara for having my shoes re-heeled, polished, and Kristin's shoes being fixed. I had two pairs of shoes there, and it cost $97 (for polishing, re-soling, and re-heeling). I was appalled, and my day was again ruined.

Then I needed to pick up our dry cleaning. The bill was $26. But they accepted coupons from a competitor, so that knocked off $4. So my day ended just a little bit better.

Today
I tried to sell one of Kristin's investments (a municipal bond from San Joaquin Hills). According to the Schwab statement, it was worth just yesterday approximately $13000. Today, when I called Schwab so that they could solicit bids on the open market, it would only fetch $7600. Again, my day wasn't going so well.

But five minutes later, a check for $50 arrived in my office. Apparently, a month ago, I had taken a survey for financial advisors, and they had promised a $50 check for completing it.

Conclusion
Clearly, on a dollar for dollar basis, things are not quite evening out right now. But it's good to see that for every loss, there's a gain. And vice versa.

Del Taco: A For Customer Service; F For Customers

2008-12-04T12:52:00.000-08:00

So I decided that today would be a Del Taco day. I've been here in Pasadena for work for six months now, and this was only my second trip. So I walk over there just after noon, and there's a line 6 deep.

Near the end of the line is a group of three people who are about four feet behind the line and huddled in a group. Thus, they didn't seem to be in line. So I got in line just in front of them. Right after that, I hear a voice right behind me, and I realize they're now officially in line. So I felt bad, asked if they were in line, then moved behind them.

Eventually, they get up to the front. Instead of ordering as a group, one person orders for herself. Then the next two order. The problem is that they really don't know what they want. Then when they got charged, they realized that they don't want what they said they ordered. Then they start re-thinking their entire order.

At this point, the girl at the cash register opens up the second register to help me, while she's still helping them. She takes my order, then I pay. She goes back to help the other two at the first cash register, who are now complaining about how much change they should be receiving. Then the girl behind the counter takes the order of another customer at the second cash register.

Finally, I got my food and left, with the people who were in line in front of me still not able to figure out their own situation. I do hope the situation was eventually resolved to everyone's benefit.

Happy Birthday to Jennifer

2008-12-03T13:27:00.000-08:00

Since Jennifer is a past award winner of this blog, we here at THE BEST BLOG EVER would like to extend her the warmest wishes on her birthday. (Please note, all you non-winners, that it's time to up your game. Logan, good job so far.)

I Just Won the Lotto

2008-12-02T21:14:00.000-08:00

I bought a $5 quick pick for the Mega Millions. The jackpot was something like $126MM. And I just happened to match the mega number plus two other numbers. So I will be collecting a cool $10 (for this 1 in 844 chance). What will I do with the money? I don't know. But I can tell you this - I will not be sharing it with Kristin. She didn't win this money; I did.

Water Bottles Everywhere

2008-12-01T20:39:00.001-08:00

Kristin is a very organized person. She has spreadsheets for everything - mailing addresses, our checking account, etc. She keeps detailed records (brokerage statements, back account statements, tax returns, medical and dental records, car maintenance records, insurance statements, etc). She never throws away her credit card receipts. Our apartment is kept organized at all times. We even have a calendar going out six months to make sure we're not double-booked (I must say that we are pretty popular).

And yet, amazingly, she will never throw away her water bottles. There are currently two semi-empty water bottles in her car, one on her night stand, and one on the coffee table. And when I mention this, she says "Why don't you mind your own business?" When I say that it is my business, she says "Oh" and then proceeds to ignore me.

And then, when I pick up after her and throw away the water bottles (into the trash), she points out that we recycle, and the trash is not where the water bottles go.

That's it. There's no moral to this story. I'm short on material for the blog, and I thought I'd write something.

Re-enactment only. This is not one of Kristin's actual water bottles, as none could be found at the time of this writing. And yes, I am aware of the irony.

Awards

2008-11-30T14:56:00.000-08:00

This blog has been up and running for a little over two months. So it's time to give out awards.

Best blogger: me (Kristin hasn't contributed anything, so I win this one by default.)

Best commenter: Jennifer Kennedy (I'm not going to say that I went back and reviewed all comments from all posts, but it seems like Jennifer is commenting at a higher level right now than anyone else.)

Best new reader: Winde Sciarra (I just heard last night that, although she started reading the blog late, she has gone gone back to the very beginning to read all posts. I was quite touched.)

Congratulations to you all. You win my praise, and maybe someday a toaster.

Clearly, we do not aim to leave anyone out, but there are only so many awards that can be handed out at any one time. So if you don't see your name here today, do not worry, as there will be plenty of opportunities for recognition.

One More Picture From Dallas

2008-11-25T16:36:00.001-08:00

We went to Chuy's on Sunday for lunch. Jennifer and Monty came, and they brought Reece. The little man is cute. So that Kristin doesn't start getting ideas in her head, I think it's time to go buy a dog.

Pictures From Dallas

2008-11-25T12:57:00.000-08:00

So I was informed this weekend that this blog needs more pictures. So what my readers want, I provide!

First off, the pre-party at Kristin & Nathan's place: Kristin, Amanda, Kristin, Tracy, and Kate

At the rehearsal dinner, which was held inside the death star.
The wedding cake. I had a piece; it was quite delicious.

The groom's cake: "Forbidden donut."
The first dance. The bride and groom were having a good time out there.
The father-daughter dance.
The Spazmatics.

Larry Jefferson, dominating out on the dance floor.

The following picture is the writer of the blog and his lovely wife, who has still not contributed anything to the blog.

The Nunnellys.
Tracy and Matt, just standing there.

Today's Activities

2008-11-22T13:23:00.001-08:00

The Nunnellys came out to Dallas for the wedding. So I spent the day with them. First, we went to the JFK museum, as today is the 45th anniversary of his assassination. It was very interesting to learn more about him, his presidency, and the events of that day. Then we went to lunch. But we almost ended up at Hooters, which could have been a little awkward.

Live Blogging From Dallas

2008-11-22T08:08:00.001-08:00

We're here in Dallas for Kristin and Nathan's wedding tonight at 5pm. Congratulations to both of you.

Beyond that, I really don't have much to discuss, other than how I found this fantastic app for my iPhone which allows you to blog remotely. (And if you're annoyed that I'm still talking about my iPhone, then you probably don't have one.)

My Favorite Toys

2008-11-20T19:07:00.001-08:00

So with my new iPhone, I got to thinking about what my favorite toys are. What recreational items could I not live without? The iPhone is certainly up there near the top, but is it the most important to me? And the answer is no. So I thought long and hard about this very important issue, and here’s my top four (only four because I couldn’t come up with five):

Microsoft Excel: Yes, I’m a big nerd, there’s no doubt about it. Excel is the most wonderful tool I use at work and at home, and I honestly can’t imagine how anything got done in business without it.
iPhone: Give me a couple more weeks, and maybe I’ll move this up to #1. This has certainly changed my life in the three days that I’ve been using it, and it will only get better once I figure out more of the features and download more apps.
DFA Returns Program: This one probably makes me an even bigger dork. But since my current job involves investing, I have access to this fantastic software through the company that provides us our mutual funds. I can put together and compare portfolios, understand their historical returns and volatilities, figure out best/worst-case scenarios, etc etc etc. I even used it to create our current investment portfolio (REALLY risky). Of course, we’re losing a TON of money in the stock market right now, so maybe I should stop playing with the returns program. But at least we’re “long-term investors.”
My Dyson DC-14 Animal vacuum cleaner: In our apartment, I’m the one who cleans. Now, normally, vacuuming is a woman’s job, unless you have this phenomenal piece of equipment.

That’s all I have. Again, no derogatory remarks about my interests, as I’ve already acknowledged how lame I am.

My iPhone

2008-11-18T18:16:00.000-08:00

My iPhone is here. My life is so much better. If you would like to get me a gift, I am registered at the Apple store.

Pictures of the happy family to be posted shortly.

BCS Standings - USC

2008-11-18T18:14:00.000-08:00

So the BCS rankings currently look like this:

Alabama
Texas Tech
Texas
Florida
Oklahoma
USC

Is there an outside chance that USC could still win the National Championship? Of course there is. It starts this Saturday with Texas Tech beating Oklahoma, moving USC to #5. Then on Thanksgiving, Texas A&M beats Texas (although I will be watching this with the Nunnellys, and there's a good chance that objects could be thrown at my head if this were to happen). This would move USC to #4. Then Missouri beats Texas Tech in the Dr. Pepper Big 12 Championship game (during which you will see no less than 72 airings of the Dr. J / Dr. Pepper commercial). This is entirely possible because Tech runs a finesse offense, and it only takes the offense being a little out of sync to screw up. And on the same day, we'd need a blowout in the SEC Championship game. It wouldn't matter who won, just that it's not close. And all of a sudden, USC is #2, ready to destroy the SEC champ in the national championship game in Miami.

For that matter, all I'd need is a loss by Texas in the Holiday Bowl, and I might even get my carrot cake.

So how about Texas? What's it gonna take for them to get to and win the national championship? Unfortunately, I'm not allowed to express an opinion anymore, because I would have both Kristins, Amanda, Tracy, and any number of other UT alums ready to punch me in the face this weekend if I said something that they didn't like.

My Parallel Parking Skills Are Unparalleled

2008-11-14T21:40:00.000-08:00

Tonight, I went to dinner with some friends. We went to El Cholo. Anyway, due to my extreme cheapness, I refused to pay for valet parking, even though Kristin and I determined that we should always valet when going there so as to avoid a repeat of the $47 parking ticket we got the last time we parked on the street. (Sorry for the run-on sentence.) So as I said, I was looking for a spot on the street, and I found it. It wasn't very big, but I am probably one of the best parallel parkers of all time. So I maneuvered my car into the spot in one attempt. It was truly a masterpiece, a work of art, if you will. (Just to put this into context, my car is a boat, and it doesn't turn very well.) That's it; that's the end of the story. I just thought you all should know just how good I am, since I do not excel at many other things.

Movie Review: Quantum of Solace

2008-11-14T17:23:00.000-08:00

I saw Casino Royale when it came out two years ago. (Actually, a co-worker and I ditched work the day before Thanksgiving to go watch it.) And I finished up at my conference early today, so I walked over to third street promenade, paid $9.50 for the matinee, and then spent the next two hours wondering what was going on. Seriously, maybe I'm just stupid, or maybe I was just bored, but I had no clue about what was happening during the whole movie.

Jury Duty

2008-11-14T17:22:00.000-08:00

Kristin just completed her second day of it. She is pissed!

A New Addition To Our Family

2008-11-12T11:20:00.000-08:00

As was the purpose of this blog from the very beginning, you, our loyal readers, will be able to find the most important news of the Pagano family here as soon as it is released to our adoring public.

So without further adieu, there will be a new addition to our family soon. It is on its way. Yes, you guessed it, Kristin and I will be welcoming into our family a beautiful, brand new iphone in just a few days. Our lives will forever be changed for the better, and I hope you will join us in this wonderful time.

Actually, this is an early Christmas present from Kristin to me. We had made an arrangement this year that we would not be exchanging gifts (due to the cost of her 1-year anniversary ring), but Kristin ignored that agreement. She then decided and is about to execute upon her gift to herself. And then she decided on this gift for me (which I admit I really want but would never pay for). So the next time you see us, and we can't afford lunch, feel free to lend us a hand. Also, when you hear Kristin say that she wants to retire and I respond that she can't, please realize that I'm not just being cheap, but it's Kristin who has already spent all our money.

Finally...

2008-11-11T16:27:00.001-08:00

I finally finished all the work Halloween candy. I won't lie to you, it was a real commitment. And there were times when I doubted that I could consume that many Baby Ruths, Twix, Snickers, Milky Ways, Butterfingers, and Reese's peanut butter cups. But when I commit myself to something, as I did in this case, there is nothing that can stop me. I want to thank everyone for their love and support during this difficult time. Without you, I still would have been able to succeed.

An Intervention

2008-11-11T16:13:00.000-08:00

It sounds like the UT girls are planning an intervention. I won't reveal my source (so as to maintain my journalistic integrity), but it seems as if Amanda does not agree with my thoughts about Texas Tech, Oklahoma, and the rest of the Big 12 rivalry structure. Therefore, it seems she is colluding (is that the right word here?) with Kristin Jefferson, Kristin Pagano (the semi-co-writer of this blog), and Tracy Davis.

Apparently, I'm supposed to get on board with their point of view. I can only assume that the next time I see all four of them at the same time, they are going to ambush me and then start singing "Texas Fight" or the "The Eyes of Texas" while I cry and plead for them to stop.

I don't know what to do! Suggestions, please!

I Cannot Win

2008-11-10T14:26:00.001-08:00

It seems all the ladies from Texas are ganging up on me right now. See posts below. Although they make a compelling point, I'm still not on board. I mean, what's wrong with having more rivals? Why not have every week be rivalry week? What's wrong with that? What are you guys afraid of?

Anyway, I think this blog has been too heavily dependent on the Longhorns for subject matter. I think we're going to have to redirect our efforts to more important matters.

Kristin Is Wrong

2008-11-09T19:08:00.000-08:00

See her post below.

Texas Tech Is Not Our Rival

2008-11-09T18:43:00.000-08:00

Kristin here, with my first post ever:

I disagree with Chris in the prior two posts, and I agree with Amanda.

Proof That Texas Tech and Texas Are Rivals

2008-11-09T18:39:00.001-08:00

Pulled from comments from my last post:

Amanda said...
"haha...this post was hilarious! I validate Kristin's method in watching college football as it is the same method I use when I watch it. I think it makes it more exciting to yell at the TV and I also use the same words of "get him", "stupid", etc. Regarding your Texas Tech comment, they are in no way our rival...they are just an annoyingly lucky team to have made it as far as they have. They will be destroyed against our true rival of OU in two weeks!"

The fact that Amanda wants OU to beat Texas Tech in two weeks shows that she doesn't hate OU as much as she hates Tech. Someone would never want their true rival to win a football game. Ipso facto ergo, Texas Tech is now your true rival. Done and done.

Two Ways to Watch College Football

2008-11-09T08:00:00.001-08:00

Before we get to the main topic of this post, I'd like to discuss another issue of significant importance. Last week, before and after the UT-Texas Tech, Kristin (and I'm sure many of her fellow UT alums) were claiming that it was stupid to think that Texas Tech could be their rival. Tech was just annoying, but certainly not a rival. Anyway, with Texas Tech winning last night (and solidifying the #2 spot for this week, if not #1), this has angered/frustrated/annoyed Kristin. Apparently, she cannot live in a country where Texas Tech is ranked #1; she's willing to move to Canada. So my question is this: How can Texas Tech not be your rival if their success has such a negative impact on you?

Therefore, I declare Texas-Texas Tech to be the biggest rivalry in college football! Period! Done! No arguments please!

OK, so let's discuss more important issues. There are two ways to watch college football, at least in our household. One way is to be on edge through every play, to get visibly upset and make negative remarks when your team is doing poorly, and to praise your school as the greatest ever whenever your team is playing well. These actions start with the opening kick-off, and increase in intensity as the game ends (assuming a close game). If not a close game, the comments still continue but aren't nearly as intense. The second way to watch a game is to just take it all in and to get excited (in the first half) only when there's a score. If the game is close at halftime, then you wouldn't have missed much, as it's the second half which will make all the difference, and you can start really getting into the game. If the game is a blowout at halftime, then you wish you hadn't wasted your time watching the first half, and at least you won't need to watch the second half.

So you can probably guess who is who in our household. Every play for the Longhorns is so very important to Kristin. The following phrases can be heard whenever Kristin is watching the Longhorns:

"Get him!"
"Stupid!"
"Idiot!"
"I love you Colt!"
"Ahhhh, I miss Vince."

Some of these phrases were even heard yesterday when Texas was up 42-21 against Baylor with 1 minute left in the game. This process leads her blood pressure to increase and/or to have a bad attitude when the Longhorns are down.

So, in conclusion, I'm not going to say that my method of watching college football is better, except that it is.

I Voted

2008-11-04T19:22:00.000-08:00

So I finally made it to the voting booth today. I went to St. Paul's Lutheran Church here in Santa Monica, three blocks from our apartment.

A few important notes:
1. I had to cast a provisional ballot, since my registration didn't show up on their voter rolls. I definitely registered, and got paperwork back to confirm my registration. I think I've been disenfranchised.
2. President - [redacted by Kristin, who believes political issues one way or the other are t0o controversial]
3. Rent board - My landlord had a sign promoting Kronovet. I don't know who this Kronovet person is or what their agenda may be, but I'm not supporting anyone my landlord is.
4. Public transportation - I voted yes on all propositions relating to more public transportation. I don't care how much more it costs in taxes (and I think I may have read $900MM, but those are just pesky details), but I want more public transportation here in Southern California. Kristin was appalled, as she thinks this is unregulated spending and a giant waste of money. I, on the other hand, am interested in investing in our future.

Texas at Texas Tech

2008-11-02T18:12:00.000-08:00

I won't comment on the game yesterday, just Kristin's reactions to it. By midway through the second quarter, Kristin was already working through the third stage of grief. After a brief argument concerning her poor attitude, we stopped talking for a few minutes. As we made our way through the second half, she got through the next four stages, so much so that by the end of the game, she had already internalized the loss (even though victory had been SOOOO close).

I would like to add, for the record, that I had a piece of cheesecake during the second half, exactly when Texas started its comeback. If I had been allowed to have one more (or been authorized to have it this morning for the GP of Brazil), then I think Texas would have won.

Speaking of auto racing, the Brazilian Grand Prix was fantastic. For you auto racing haters (all of you), the race started in the rain, and ended in the rain, with dry weather in between. And when Lewis Hamilton needed to make up one position or else lose the championship, he made a pass on the driver ahead of him who was skating around in the rain on dry-weather tires. Simply amazing! Kristin was not impressed as I yelled in excitement at the TV.

Canceled: Cheesecake and Auto Racing

2008-11-01T09:12:00.000-07:00

As per our agreement on Thursday evening (see the previous post), I was supposed to be allowed to watch qualifying for the Brazilian GP while having cheesecake for breakfast. As of now, Kristin has decided that "we" should have ham and eggs for breakfast. While I no doubt appreciate my wife's efforts to cook for me (and even keep me healthy), I must say that I'm disappointed not to be enjoying some of my favorite food while watching my favorite sport. I am also disappointed that Kristin has not honored her commitment in this situation. As such, I am not quite as excited about today's upcoming events as I was previously. And my ability to enthusiastically root for the Longhorns tonight may be compromised.

Weather prediction for tomorrow's race: rain.

Cheesecake and Auto Racing, a Perfect Combination

2008-10-30T18:39:00.000-07:00

This weekend is the finale of the 2008 Formula1 season. The championship is on the line. It's Hamilton vs. Massa, McLaren vs. Ferrari, good vs. evil. I don't want to alarm anyone, but THIS IS BIG.

Also, I still have two pieces of cheesecake sitting in my freezer. So I have made the decision that I will watch qualifying for the race on Saturday morning and have cheesecake for breakfast. And then on Sunday, I'll have another piece of cheesecake as I watch the race.

Kristin is appalled. But whatever. Seriously, what could be better than that?

(In unimportant news, Kristin will be getting overly emotional about every Texas Tech first down this Saturday evening.)

Kristin's Contribution

2008-10-27T15:31:00.000-07:00

So Kristin decided that her contribution to this blog would be reformatting the layout. So if you've noticed a change lately, that's due to her. I don't think she's happy with these changes though, so expect more to come.

Although this is not the kind of contribution I had in mind when "we" started the blog, it's a small step in the right direction. Someday, maybe, if she gets a better attitude, she will write her own post.

I'm Ready To Be A College Football Coach

2008-10-25T17:22:00.000-07:00

We watched a very exciting Oklahoma State-Texas game today. For a time, it looked like OSU could not be stopped on the ground. Clearly, the OSU coaching staff came in with an excellent game plan. And that's why it seemed dumb that on OSU's last real drive of the game (when they had 3+ minutes), coach Mike Gundy (and/or his offense coordinator) called a pass play on third and about 8. OSU had been getting 6-8 yards per rush throughout the whole game. The Longhorns couldn't stop them. So when they knew that it was four-down territory, and Texas was playing the pass, why not rush on third down and get most (if not all) of the yards for the first down? So that was dumb.

Second, when Texas got the ball back after that series, Gundy wasn't using his timeouts to conserve time. Also, very dumb.

(None of the above should be construed as me not rooting for Texas.)

Therefore, I am declaring that I am ready to be a college football coach. And I don't mean special teams coach or even offensive/defensive coordinator. I mean I'm ready to be a head coach.

And while we're at it, I'm noticing that McCain is still polling nationally at about 40%. That means 40% of Americans think that Palin is qualified to be Vice President (and thus qualified to be President if McCain were to keel over). And since I'm fairly confident that I have a better command of the issues than does Palin, I declare that I am qualified to be President of these United States of America. So on election day, please feel free to write me in. I thank you for your support.

Third Post of the Day

2008-10-25T11:08:00.000-07:00

I don't have anything to add. But since it had been over a week since the last post, I figured I needed to do at least three posts today. So this is it. Even though I don't have anything new to add, you my loyal readers should be happy that I was thinking of you.

Cheesecake Is Good

2008-10-25T11:06:00.000-07:00

Breakfast this morning consisted of mini-tacos (from Trader Joe's) and some cheesecake. It was unhealthy, but it was good, and just what I needed after a long run. (Kristin is not happy that I ate cheesecake for breakfast, but she knows that I cannot be stopped.)

Little Nicholas

2008-10-25T10:56:00.000-07:00

This is our nephew, little Nicholas Pagano. Of course, he likes Kristin more than me, so that's lame. But otherwise, he rocks. And there is a very good chance that he'll end up kicking as much ass as his uncle.

And if you have baby pictures of your own, I'll post them as well on this awesome blog.

True Story

2008-10-15T17:52:00.000-07:00

So I was at the jewelry store yesterday picking up Kristin's ring (I realize that I'm setting a bad precedent here), and I was dealing with senior gemologist Jw. Jw, by the way, is a dead ringer for NPH (that's Neil Patrick Harris, for you uninitiated), in more ways than one. Anyway, Jw sells me on the jewelry care plan for my ring, which has completely lost its finish. So I gave him my ring, and I've been without it since yesterday.

So today, all the ladies noticed that I was without my ring, and thinking I was still single, they couldn't help themselves. So I told them that I am in fact happily married. They all walked away very disappointed.

Red River Shootout Redux

2008-10-11T17:32:00.000-07:00

So here are some random thoughts on the big game:

1. I rooted for Texas. I legitimately wanted them to win. Please remember that such a win was against my interests (at least as it pertains to me getting carrot cake). Also remember that Kristin would NEVER root for USC as long as a pair of jeans for her is at stake. So since I am the bigger person, doesn't that mean that I deserve some carrot cake nonetheless? (Kristin Jefferson, I'm looking in your direction. Back me up here.)

2. The second running-into-the-kicker penalty that Texas incurred was really stupid (even though it was debatable whether that was even a penalty). They had already had one earlier in the game, and it didn't hurt them at that time. But this one led to a first down and then Oklahoma's final touchdown. Mack Brown may be one of the best coaches in college football, but he and/or his special teams' coach had their heads up their asses on that play. If that hadn't happened, Texas might have won by 17, and they'd have a much stronger claim to #1 in this week's rankings.

3. Lewis Hamilton is on pole for the Japanese Grand Prix, with Filipe Massa starting fifth. This is excellent news for Lewis' chances for the World Driving Championship.

4. The play before Texas scored the go-ahead touchdown (to take the lead 38-35), Texas converted on third and long from about the 40, all the way down to the one foot line. But anyway, on that 40-yard play, one of the Texas players made one of the greatest blocks I've ever seen on #11 of Oklahoma. That player is now my favorite Longhorn. Who was that who made the block?

5. We went to The Parlor to watch the game. At the bar, there were a couple of OU fans. One in particular was quite annoying. Whenever OU did anything good, he was quite loud, and he single-handedly turned the rest of the bar against OU. Also, I just happened to go to the bathroom right after him, and I noticed that he urinated all over the toilet seat, and he didn't even wash his hands. So I don't know what kind of people most OU fans are, but this guy was certainly a bad apple.

That's it for now. UT fans, you can enjoy your win. Good luck the rest of the season. I am gracious now, but if you make it to Miami, and USC is there as well, I cannot promise to be so nice.

Red River Shootout

2008-10-09T19:28:00.000-07:00

So this Saturday, at 9am (pacific), the Longhorns play the Sooners ("cheaters," as Randy might say). This game is HUGE! If Texas wins, that puts Texas on the road to the national championship, and my carrot cake is in danger. If Texas loses, Kristin will not be in a good for the rest of the weekend. So as you can see, this is a lose-lose situation for me.

Does anyone have any thoughts here? What are my options? Do I root for a Texas win, a Texas blowout, a Sooner win, or a Sooner blowout? And if so, why?

Also of note, the Grand Prix of Japan, for all you Eurotrash F1 racing fans (like me).

Road Rage

2008-10-08T19:13:00.000-07:00

So I was carpooling with my friend Matt today. Traffic on the 10 was so bad that Matt made the snap decision to get off the freeway and take Venice all the way down. This requires a short trek through a not-so-great part of town.

Anyway, as we're leisurely heading down Venice, some guy tries to make a left-hand turn right in front of us, nearly causing an accident. So Matt hits his horn (totally justified), and the guy holds up before getting into our lane, and then gets in behind us. At the next light, we're sitting there, and he pulls up alongside us (two lanes over), and he's got his head out the window, yelling at us. He was kind of a scary looking guy, and I made the mistake of looking over at him and making eye contact, so that probably didn't help the situation.

As the light goes green, the guy takes off and pulls into the lane directly next to us. So Matt goes slow, trying to avoid confrontation. Matt eventually pulls in behind the guy, actually two cars behind. So the guy makes a quick right and stops, waiting for us to pass him. As we do, he's still got his head out the window, still yelling at us. And that was the last we saw of him.

But Matt seemed a little perturbed by the whole situation, maybe even frightened. I, of course, was not too much concerned about this. After all, I'm a veteran of road-rage incidents, having been punched in the face by a guy in a Ford Taurus in Santa Clara about two years ago.

The lesson: I am one tough dude, and Matt is not.

Neil Diamond

2008-10-03T18:46:00.000-07:00

Last night, we went to see Neil Diamond in concert at the Hollywood Bowl. We went with my parents. Also present were my cousin and my aunt and uncle. So clearly, Neil Diamond runs deep in my family.

Anyway, let me just say this: Neil Diamond was freakin' awesome last night. If you have never seen him in concert, you should go the next time he's in town. And if you don't like his music, stop reading this blog.

I Got Nothing

2008-09-30T21:14:00.000-07:00

Ideas for the blog are drying up. I've had no new inspiration or motivation to write lately. Maybe I set the bar just too high. Maybe a blog of this caliber has a short shelf life. I can only wonder: Is this the last hurrah?

Any comments or words of inspiration would be helpful. Or maybe I just need a week to recuperate from such a high level of blogging.

Anyway, here are some upcoming events for C/K Pagano:
Thursday: Neil Diamond concert; recording the Biden/Palin debate because that is sure to be train-wreck caliber television
Friday: dinner at Capo to celebrate our first anniversary, and if you can extend us some credit, we'll be needing it
Saturday: USC vs. Oregon, where Cheryl and John owe me one bacon-wrapped hotdog from a street vendor
Sunday: Looks like Michael and Christina (my brother and sister-in-law) are in town with little Nicholas. Looks like the little man is already a Notre Dame fan. Well, I can tell you this: No Christmas present for him!

Tonight's Presidential Debate

2008-09-26T21:05:00.000-07:00

As I mentioned earlier, I would comment on it. So let me say this. It was kind of boring and disappointing. Aside from the two slices of pepperoni pizza I had, the Weekend of Pags has been a slight letdown. Let's hope it picks up tomorrow.

A Solid Investment in a Shaky Financial World

2008-09-26T20:58:00.000-07:00

As always, posts by readers are encouraged. We here at the blog believe in democracy and freedom of speech, so we promote all reasonable points of view. So if you would like to add something, please send it my way. Thanks.

Here is my friend Mike Yen:

Greetings Loyal Readers,

First of all, I must say that it's quite an honor to be the first guest writer on such an esteemed blog. However, I think he's asked me to step in for one of three reasons:

1) He's too lazy to write

2) Kristin's too lazy to write

3) I've been dubbed the Asian Pagano

How did I get such a moniker, you ask? Apparently, we both share the same anal-retentiveness and obsessive compulsiveness which we discovered while going to business school together. But I digress.

While I've could have posted random pictures from Hawaii or random USC - Texas ranking bets I have with my non-existent wife (Pagano, I sure hope that +8 spread cuts both way), he's asked me to write about this mess we call the financial markets.

To recap, this whole mortgage mess started when people with really crappy credit scores bought houses that they couldn't afford. These crappy mortgages were then bundled together by investment banks and sliced, diced and packaged into mortgage-backed securities that smelled like roses. How did they become less crappy? Through window dressing, wishful thinking, and financial engineering. And pension funds, universities, and other companies gobbled them up thinking, "sure, one or two of the loans might go bad, but they couldn't ALL go bad?" Things were fine and dandy as long as people paid their mortgages. But when housing prices started to go down, the people with the crappy credit scores stopped paying their mortgages ("how much lower can our credit score go anyways? Screw it.") which lead the mortgage-backed security holders to have to devalue their holdings. By a lot. Like 80% a lot. This devaluation in turn hits the company's earnings, which freaks the shareholders out creating a death spiral for the companies. In summary, we're screwed.

So, in a time when billions of dollars in shareholder value disappear literally overnight and so-called financial bedrocks crumble before our very eyes, where is an investor to turn? I'm not going to lie, the investment landscape looks pretty grim. While the traditional fund advisors would suggest purchasing shares while they're cheap (and historically the stock market has returned around 8%), the game has significantly changed from those quaint historical times. Investors today dream of a 10% return and would settle for not losing any capital.

Now, I've thought about it long and hard, did many hours of research, and consulted with the finest investing minds. After much discussion, I've found one asset class that should appreciate in value over time - handbags. Not just any handbags - Birkins, to be precise.

DEAD GATOR

Now before you poo-poo the idea, hear me out. For those of you unfamiliar with the Birkin, it is a piece of (most of the times) dead cow with some 17th century saddle maker logo on it. I don't really understand the appeal, but hey, girls have bags, boys have fantasy sports. Whatever. Regardless, pure economics are at play. There's a limited supply and a virtually limitless demand. This indicates a premium pricing opportunity and hence, high returns.

Now, how does one make money from such an asset? 1) through an outright sale or 2) by renting the asset. Based on the increase in retail price (so my friends tell me) and the fact that you’re buying a bag from the 1960s, it seems like the Birkin market is generally robust. So you could potentially flip the bag for a quick buck.

The second option, renting present a potentially more difficult valuation. Based on the market rental rate, the net present value (“NPV”) is significantly positive while the internal rate of return (“IRR”) is an astounding 92.5%! Aside from drug dealing, where else can you find a 90+% return? Both valuation indicators dictate that a purchase should be made.

NPV

IRR

With that, I'm announcing that opening of the Birkin Fund. The objective of the Birkin Fund is to (duh) purchase as many Birkins as possible with an eye towards the renting and eventual resale. Investment horizon is 3-5 years. Best case scenario - a compound annual growth return of 100% (based on the increase in Birkin retail value from 2002 through 2007 and the IRR). Worst case scenario - we liquidate inventory. Which would you rather have, a piece of Lehman Brothers shares or a Birkin?

Signing off,

Mike Yen

Weekend of Pags

2008-09-26T06:24:00.000-07:00

Today, Kristin is off to Las Vegas for Kristin Jefferson’s bachelorette party. While they will all be cavorting around town, I will be enjoying the “Weekend of Pags,” which is derived from the “Summer of George” (from Seinfeld): http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Summer_of_George

Anyway, these action-packed bachelor weekends for me started in good old Santa Clara. I’d have a weekend to myself when Kristin was gone. I’d get all excited to be on my own, only to be bored by about 11am on Saturday. This is my first weekend alone in Santa Monica, and it is going to be action packed. Here’s the schedule:

Friday: Pick up some good cheap pizza for dinner; I’m carb-loading, of course. Watch the presidential debates. I’m guessing that John McCain completely overwhelms an overmatched Obama due to McCain’s total awesomeness, his being a POW, and Obama being a Muslim terrorist. (I’ll have commentary after the debate tomorrow.) After that, I’ll go to bed early.

Saturday: Go running, take a nap, clean the apartment, watch some episodes of “Lost” (season 4), then go to my old roommate’s birthday party.

Sunday: Watch the Formula1 race from Singapore, go to lunch with my cousin, then watch some football.

So clearly, I’m a big loser. But whatever, since I’m on my own, I get to eat pizza and hamburgers for every meal, so I’m really the big winner here. Anyway, the Weekend of Pags starts in just a day!

Long Time Reader, First Time Blogger

2008-09-23T19:57:00.001-07:00

Hi, it's me, Kristin.

I just thought I'd do a post, since Chris has been asking me to do so for quite some time. So I really wanted to concentrate this post on Chris, my utterly brilliant husband who came up with the genius idea to start the best blog ever in the world.

Chris is just an amazing individual. He's super smart, a phenomenal athlete, possibly the funniest person I've ever met, and selflessly charitable. Really, what more is there to say? I'm just speechless thinking about him.

Anyway, I'm glad you're all enjoying the blog. Chris' intent was to bring joy and happiness to the world through his words, and it seems like he's making a difference, one reader at a time.

Since I am very busy playing video games at work all day, I will not be able to post all that often. But I leave you in the very capable hands of Chris. So please, enjoy.

Kristin

**This post may not have been written by Kristin.

Pictures from Hawaii

2008-09-20T11:56:00.000-07:00

So Kristin has graciously uploaded pictures from the digital camera onto the computer. (I would have done it, but I don't know how, and I don't intend to learn. She is simply better at uploading pictures, and so I will continue to defer to her.)

We stayed in a house in Poipu on the southern coast of Kauai. Here's the view from the patio.

On our first day, we made an "adventurous" trip onto the rocks to look for sea life. We didn't see much. Of course, we didn't look that hard.
On day 2, we took a monumental hike - six hours to cover just eight miles.

Here's the beach at the halfway mark (2 miles in).And here's the waterfall at 4 miles in. It took us 3+ hours to get here; it was beautiful. And we stayed for about ten minutes.
Then on Wednesday, we took a boat ride to the other side of the island. We saw some dolphins, went into some caves, and did some snorkeling. The first picture is of our boat running over some dolphins. These dolphins may now be in the tuna you are eating at home.

And here are some pictures that Kristin and I took together. We took about 50 of these, so that Kristin could get the perfect Christmas card picture.

And finally, here are some action shots of Kristin's brother Garrett and his girlfriend Elizabeth. They serve no purpose at all other than that I find them amusing.

Someday, when I stop being so lazy and take the film from the underwater camera to the store, we'll put up some pictures from the innertube ride down the irrigation ditches.

Carrot Cake

2008-09-17T19:33:00.000-07:00

Carrot cake is good! End of story!

Missing Blogger

2008-09-16T21:13:00.000-07:00

It has come to my attention that the other half of this dynamic duo is missing in action. One might postulate that she has nothing to say, or that she is just lazy, or that she is just too busy at work (she does, in fact, work quite a bit, or at least spends a lot of time at work playing video games, but that's another story for another time). But I am going to go out on a limb and say that she just doesn't care for this blog. And that, my friends, is a shame.

Please send your comments directly to kristin.pagano@yahoo.com and encourage her to contribute to this blog.

Thank you for your support.

Sports Commentary

2008-09-15T18:49:00.000-07:00

I only really like three sports these days:
1. Football
2. Auto racing - everyone makes fun of me for this
3. Ultimate fighting - Kristin doesn't let me watch this whenever she's within a 10-mile radius.

This post will therefore reflect this weekend's events in the world of football.

Ohio State vs. USC: While everyone is talking about USC's dominating performance over the Buckeyes and all the Trojans fans are again talking about another national championship, I am fretting over #7 Texas. As some of you may know, Kristin is a proud alum of the Unversity of Texas. As such, we made a bet. Because USC started 8 spots ahead of Texas in both polls, 8 spots is the handicap for our bet. If Texas finishes 8 spots or less in the rankings behind USC, then Kristin gets to buy a new pair of jeans. If USC finishes 8 spots or more ahead of Texas, then I get a whole carrot cake for myself (I don't have to share, and I can eat it in as many or as few sittings as I so desire). But based on the current rankings, I am losing this bet. I need an improvement of three spots to be in the money on this one. I hope the cake gods are on my side on this one.

San Diego Chargers at Denver Broncos: As a Broncos fan, I was happy to see my team pull one out yesterday. Of course, they won because of an erroneous call by the referee in their favor. Now, I do feel bad that the Broncos didn't deserve to win, but Chargers QB Phillip Rivers is a dick, so whatever.

Back From Vacation

2008-09-15T18:32:00.000-07:00

We're back from Hawaii. Kristin and I spent a week with the Nunnelly gang in a house in Kauai. We had lots of fun. Of course, the highlights (at least for me) were the following (in no particular order):
1. Vacation eating - Kristin gave me a minor reprieve on my poor eating habits, and I increased my caloric intake by about 200%.
2. The 8-mile round-trip hike to the waterfall (I'd write out the name, but I don't know it, and I don't want to look it up). This hike was not for the faint for heart, and Kristin and I turned in a dominating performance.
3. The innertube ride down the irrigation dicthes which supply water to the sugar mills. It was kind of like riding in the lazy river at the Mandalay Bay, except the lazy river at the Mandalay Bay sucks. This trip took us about an hour; we went through five tunnels that were pitch black, and one of them a half mile long.
4. Kristin and I took about 50 pictures so that she could get the perfect picture for a christmas card photo. Absurd!

We got back this morning into LAX at 4:30am. Kristin went into work; I stayed home and recuperated.

Pictures to follow once Kristin uploads the pictures onto the computer and figure out how to get them onto the blog.